It was a bit cold and damp, and I had spent Sunday in my study considering the mind-beef problem. A perfect night to go to the local chophouse, no? Yes! I called Billford, my executive assistant and companion, and asked him to meet me at the local chophouse. Fast forward a couple of hours, and there I am with Billford at our usual cozy corner booth, plush red leather, oak panels, warm lighting, chophouse fumes wafting.
"What will it be tonight?" I ask Billford. "Well, I do believe tonight would be an excellent night for a filet mignon in a pepper sauce!" says Billford. "Ah, my good man, you really do surprise me. Just moments ago you said you were jonesing for the most flavorful beef you can imagine! Did you not say that?" said I. "Why indeed I did! What of it?" Billford gurgitated. "Well, dear heart, a porterhouse or ribeye has MUCH more flavor than a filet. If you're looking for a tender beef, then by all means proceed with a filet. But you have twice affirmed your interest in FLAVOR, and if you speak the true state of your desire, you must not order the filet and instead go with a cut with much more marbling." Billford sat astonished and then spoke: "My dear fellow! You are quite right!"
The beef was ordered (porterhouse for two), as were sides galore. Shrimp cocktail? Check. Wedge salad? Check. Thick cut bacon of course. Potatoes au gratin AND house cut fries? You better believe it. And, it goes without saying, extra fresh garlic for the table! We sat in heaven, spreading garlic over the food and our faces, ravenously attacking the beef and carbs. At one point I lost control and started screaming "garlic! garlic!"
Eventually I returned to my senses, but not for long. I came out of my garlic delirium to quickly find myself in a creme conundrum. Billford had ordered us hot fudge ice cream sundaes with fresh schlaag, and who am I to abstain from freshly whipped creme, even in the condition I was in? The vanilla ice cream and hot fudge blended together in a cacophony of bliss. Sliced, toasted almonds added crunch and delicate flavor, and, and, of course there was the fresh creme, blanketing the sundae pleasures in its rich, velvety bosom. The last thing I remember that night is slipping into a peaceful, deep sleep. Yet the aroma of beef and fresh garlic was there.
